The Love Guru Paradox

The Love Guru is a man (or men) who inhabits the late night slot on your local radio station. The exalted one, he has dedicated his life to answering the queries of anguished callers on all the difficult questions they have about their love life, dating life and sex life (or lack thereof). And he seems to know a lot. Have you ever stumped a love guru with any question, or ever heard of such an incident?
Always audibly shaken, but never stirred; he is wildly unconventional and strictly moral at the same time. With equal ease, he handles teenagers developing budding forbidden passions for their cousins and 40-year old moms insecure about their appearance - he doesn't blink even when asked how to get a date as an engineering college student. And his voice, his soothing, gentle drone, no matter what your trouble might be, one call and he has you nodding in agreement... and/or drowsiness.

Hence the paradox. Why is such a distinguished man, obviously possessing every skill necessary to get with the hottest ladies (including a hypnotic sedative voice), stuck every night on radio, recording in a small room somewhere?


We see that time and again all around us, don't we. People selling get rich quick schemes. If they know how to, why aren't they rich already? And if this is how they are getting there, then why doesn't their book have 'write a self help book' as the best get rich quick scheme?


I call it the Love Guru Paradox, where a person claims to be superlatively capable, enough to be advising other people on how to be awesome, yet has himself not capitalised on the wisdom of his teachings. Prophets of change, or so they would claim, yet they would spend their lives sitting in a basement, probably blogging their lives away. Phoney Nerds. Well, if there is an answer to this paradox, no mere mortal can find it. This is job for 'The Man'. Dont worry dear readers, I will find the secret of success, and when I do, you had better watch out for that blog post.